








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 603 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 321 matches | ||
| Premier | 138 matches | ||
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4426 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,221 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6394 | 25% |
| Smokes | 7136 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6968 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4723 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,956,721 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 930 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KkillerDude | 60% | 194 |
| #2 | boba | 59% | 257 |
| #3 | Chef_Y | 58% | 521 |
| #4 | Zephyrus^ | 52% | 79 |
| #5 | nico | 51% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | boba | 59% | 257 |
| #3 | Chef_Y | 58% | 521 |
| #4 | Zephyrus^ | 52% | 79 |
| #5 | nico | 51% | 75 |
| #6 | purple | 42% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chef_Y | 16 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | KkillerDude | 11 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | nico | 11 | 0.0073 |
| #4 | boba | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | purple | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chef_Y | 796 | 0.08 | 17 min |
| #2 | KkillerDude | 674 | 0.17 | 18 min |
| #3 | boba | 588 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #4 | Zephyrus^ | 360 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #5 | nico | 229 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chef_Y | +2.00 | 74 | 54 |
| #2 | nico | +1.33 | 75 | 73 |
| #3 | boba | +0.13 | 73 | 66 |
| #4 | pineapple jam | -0.13 | 42 | 58 |
| #5 | KkillerDude | -1.01 | 60 | 67 |





