








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 122 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1012 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,176 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 125 | 6% |
| Smokes | 678 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 401 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 972 | 45% |
Our logs show you have wasted $407,760 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RUSH B OR CYKA | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | Nike_Sensei | 48% | 60 |
| #3 | 𝔍𝔬𝔥𝔫𝔫𝔜2J ✝ | 47% | 104 |
| #4 | qrs | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | AKredrum | 44% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | 𝔍𝔬𝔥𝔫𝔫𝔜2J ✝ | 47% | 104 |
| #4 | qrs | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | AKredrum | 44% | 82 |
| #6 | Makaveli | 41% | 59 |
| #7 | Reaper | 40% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝔍𝔬𝔥𝔫𝔫𝔜2J ✝ | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Makaveli | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | qrs | 2 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | Nike_Sensei | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AKredrum | 163 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | 𝔍𝔬𝔥𝔫𝔫𝔜2J ✝ | 91 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | Makaveli | 41 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Reaper | 32 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | RUSH B OR CYKA | 23 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝔍𝔬𝔥𝔫𝔫𝔜2J ✝ | +4.46 | 78 | 44 |
| #2 | RUSH B OR CYKA | +1.50 | 48 | 51 |
| #3 | qrs | +1.29 | 76 | 47 |
| #4 | AKredrum | +0.20 | 75 | 43 |
| #5 | Reaper | -1.51 | 37 | 39 |





