








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2195 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 185 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 70 matches | ||
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7006 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,844 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6383 | 25% |
| Smokes | 8743 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 3408 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 7310 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,544,594 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1827 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SirPolar | 57% | 42 |
| #2 | SqueeZ | 56% | 71 |
| #3 | OHMYGOODNESSVALENTINE | 55% | 104 |
| #4 | dDeeVo | 51% | 91 |
| #5 | 2020 Tacko Fall | 50% | 202 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2020 Tacko Fall | 743 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #2 | Poonok | 714 | 0.13 | 19 min |
| #3 | dDeeVo | 519 | 0.27 | 15 min |
| #4 | twisto | 326 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #5 | SqueeZ | 290 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BettyWhite | +2.97 | 89 | 62 |
| #2 | OHMYGOODNESSVALENTINE | +2.79 | 82 | 45 |
| #3 | dDeeVo | +2.26 | 74 | 83 |
| #4 | SirPolar | +1.73 | 83 | 66 |
| #5 | twisto | +0.65 | 57 | 58 |





