








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 301 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 279 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 55 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3299 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,189 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6031 | 24% |
| Smokes | 7662 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5868 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 5628 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $953,725 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 176 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I n T e X | 64% | 39 |
| #2 | Waschi | 52% | 94 |
| #3 | Bob_Marley | 50% | 64 |
| #4 | Timsi | 49% | 120 |
| #5 | twiffty | 49% | 185 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Timsi | 49% | 120 |
| #5 | twiffty | 49% | 185 |
| #6 | ThE_F4me | 47% | 114 |
| #7 | mo_JaZzM4n | 44% | 126 |
| #8 | MoldenMoc | 44% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ThE_F4me | 16 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | twiffty | 9 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | mo_JaZzM4n | 8 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Timsi | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | I n T e X | 6 | 0.0074 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | twiffty | 629 | 0.17 | 16 min |
| #2 | mo_JaZzM4n | 438 | 0.17 | 12 min |
| #3 | ThE_F4me | 366 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Timsi | 176 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #5 | Bob_Marley | 141 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Waschi | +2.19 | 78 | 60 |
| #2 | ThE_F4me | +2.05 | 86 | 60 |
| #3 | MoldenMoc | +0.63 | 81 | 62 |
| #4 | I n T e X | +0.48 | 78 | 72 |
| #5 | Timsi | +0.32 | 73 | 67 |





