








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 302 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 285 matches | ||
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




78 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4086 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,192 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2402 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3190 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4150 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3450 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,044,825 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 866 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | srf | 58% | 98 |
| #2 | kymby | 50% | 48 |
| #3 | EhX | 48% | 25 |
| #4 | Cr1m1nal | 48% | 138 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | srf | 58% | 98 |
| #2 | kymby | 50% | 48 |
| #3 | EhX | 48% | 25 |
| #4 | Cr1m1nal | 48% | 138 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cr1m1nal | 23 | 0.0083 |
| #2 | srf | 8 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | EhX | 4 | 0.0079 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cr1m1nal | 529 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #2 | srf | 414 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #3 | kymby | 52 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | EhX | 13 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | srf | +1.72 | 80 | 73 |
| #2 | kyth | +1.19 | 82 | 54 |
| #3 | Cr1m1nal | -0.12 | 60 | 63 |
| #4 | EhX | -0.85 | 61 | 41 |
| #5 | kymby | -2.00 | 64 | 40 |





