








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 563 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4140 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,323 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5461 | 41% |
| Smokes | 2919 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2078 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2865 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $894,788 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 74 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skyro | 70% | 23 |
| #2 | mashallah habibi | 59% | 76 |
| #3 | Jun | 56% | 308 |
| #4 | johnny | 55% | 285 |
| #5 | PooPooShit | 54% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | mashallah habibi | 59% | 76 |
| #3 | Jun | 56% | 308 |
| #4 | johnny | 55% | 285 |
| #5 | PooPooShit | 54% | 63 |
| #6 | ✪Chase | 53% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | johnny | 22 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | ✪Chase | 7 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | mashallah habibi | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Jun | 3 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | PooPooShit | 3 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | johnny | 1035 | 0.17 | 30 min |
| #2 | Jun | 667 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #3 | ✪Chase | 182 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | mashallah habibi | 84 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | PooPooShit | 61 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skyro | +3.28 | 89 | 48 |
| #2 | | +2.73 | 91 | 76 |
| #3 | johnny | +1.89 | 85 | 72 |
| #4 | Jun | -1.04 | 61 | 58 |
| #5 | PooPooShit | -1.43 | 52 | 47 |





