








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 299 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 157 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1117 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,864 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2709 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2432 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2528 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2195 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $874,526 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 194 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | StilleNat | 42% | 24 |
| #10 | m-klein1995 | 40% | 62 |
| #11 | SnB | 40% | 25 |
| #12 | Bytees | 36% | 25 |
| #13 | Bali | 33% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Købmanden | 13 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | Bytees | 7 | 0.0125 |
| #3 | OPiWan | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Bali | 6 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | ☯️CopyNinja | 3 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kølle-Bølle-Astrup | +3.70 | 85 | 69 |
| #2 | Købmanden | +2.90 | 39 | 77 |
| #3 | Bytees | +2.84 | 73 | 74 |
| #4 | Ng1t0 | +2.00 | 65 | 56 |
| #5 | ☯️CopyNinja | +1.39 | 62 | 56 |





