








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 328 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 386 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3103 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,932 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 888 | 11% |
| Smokes | 722 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 3097 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 3225 | 41% |
Our logs show you have wasted $213,795 of utility $22 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 209 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qbuddiii | 54% | 35 |
| #2 | Alawiii | 52% | 122 |
| #3 | GrEtA tHuNbErG | 51% | 348 |
| #4 | KONNYs | 51% | 270 |
| #5 | feliciablksthl♕ | 44% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | GrEtA tHuNbErG | 51% | 348 |
| #4 | KONNYs | 51% | 270 |
| #5 | feliciablksthl♕ | 44% | 64 |
| #6 | BÓBR KURWA | 39% | 44 |
| #7 | Krunk | 38% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GrEtA tHuNbErG | 40 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | KONNYs | 34 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | Alawiii | 13 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | Krunk | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | feliciablksthl♕ | 3 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GrEtA tHuNbErG | 1380 | 0.19 | 32 min |
| #2 | KONNYs | 686 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #3 | Krunk | 201 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | Qbuddiii | 148 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | Alawiii | 144 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KONNYs | +1.41 | 50 | 53 |
| #2 | GrEtA tHuNbErG | +1.07 | 40 | 55 |
| #3 | Qbuddiii | +0.35 | 46 | 82 |
| #4 | Krunk | -0.12 | 43 | 63 |
| #5 | Alawiii | -0.60 | 29 | 61 |





