








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 435 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 187 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2345 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,854 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4192 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2437 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3355 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1870 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $879,031 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 321 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Brian! :-) | 46% | 41 |
| #7 | brybry | 46% | 130 |
| #8 | Brian! :-) | 46% | 137 |
| #9 | Feeede | 44% | 131 |
| #10 | Hoier | 40% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brybry | 20 | 0.0073 |
| #2 | Brian! :-) | 10 | 0.0115 |
| #3 | pinguinZ | 8 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Brian! :-) | 7 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Feeede | 4 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pinguinZ | 1040 | 0.31 | 28 min |
| #2 | Brian! :-) | 914 | 0.34 | 22 min |
| #3 | Thomas // TT | 349 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | Feeede | 306 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | Brian! :-) | 292 | 0.34 | 8 min |





