










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
176 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 881 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 175 | 20% |
| Smokes | 219 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 347 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 140 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $55,271 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MNK ツ | 44% | 9 |
| #2 | Herbert_Manager | 44% | 18 |
| #3 | wad is | 39% | 18 |
| #4 | ρєωρєω | 36% | 14 |
| #5 | DÄR RÄNTNÄR | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MNK ツ | 44% | 9 |
| #2 | Herbert_Manager | 44% | 18 |
| #3 | wad is | 39% | 18 |
| #4 | ρєωρєω | 36% | 14 |
| #5 | DÄR RÄNTNÄR | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ρєωρєω | 3 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | wad is | 2 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | MNK ツ | 2 | 0.0132 |
| #4 | Herbert_Manager | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Herbert_Manager | 34 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | ρєωρєω | 23 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | MNK ツ | 14 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | wad is | 13 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | DÄR RÄNTNÄR | 3 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MNK ツ | +4.02 | 61 | 50 |
| #2 | DÄR RÄNTNÄR | +3.34 | 41 | 74 |
| #3 | Herbert_Manager | +0.28 | 69 | 73 |
| #4 | ρєωρєω | -0.10 | 75 | 57 |
| #5 | wad is | -0.97 | 41 | 43 |





