








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 230 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 225 matches | ||
| Faceit | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2906 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,633 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3554 | 24% |
| Smokes | 5203 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 2947 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2929 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,075,686 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 258 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N.M.G | 67% | 58 |
| #2 | Tilted Texas | 67% | 21 |
| #3 | yuuz:D | 60% | 30 |
| #4 | Zebra | 56% | 182 |
| #5 | svN- | 56% | 169 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | svN- | 565 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #2 | VELO;DDD | 418 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #3 | FnX | 152 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | N.M.G | 145 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | Zebra | 98 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FnX | +3.49 | 86 | 71 |
| #2 | Zebra | +1.68 | 63 | 47 |
| #3 | svN- | +0.98 | 66 | 70 |
| #4 | Tilted Texas | +0.89 | 61 | 53 |
| #5 | rdX | +0.73 | 58 | 66 |





