








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 783 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 190 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3221 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,714 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2088 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2863 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2427 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2336 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $937,068 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 228 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | FlyySoHigh^ | 41% | 17 |
| #16 | Chrisbly | 40% | 52 |
| #17 | Josi | 40% | 15 |
| #18 | EMPERIUM | 38% | 24 |
| #19 | Lars | 33% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skrt | 10 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Chrisbly | 5 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | sfgbv | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Lars | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | abc | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skrt | 398 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #2 | jR | 288 | 0.34 | 7 min |
| #3 | sfgbv | 207 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | Chrisbly | 150 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | mode push | 133 | 0.38 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SNOKEN | +1.99 | 85 | 78 |
| #2 | Mindseth | +1.64 | 66 | 71 |
| #3 | Ev1 | +1.59 | 64 | 65 |
| #4 | Laserturken | +1.06 | 91 | 81 |
| #5 | jR | +0.99 | 69 | 71 |





