








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1243 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 882 matches | ||
| Faceit | 70 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 178 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9862 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,447 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5267 | 19% |
| Smokes | 7069 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 9523 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 6588 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,923,801 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 569 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sp1rit- | 58% | 146 |
| #2 | Tops | 50% | 258 |
| #3 | simONfire_ | 50% | 326 |
| #4 | emefKay | 48% | 638 |
| #5 | Tibznor | 47% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emefKay | 12 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | simONfire_ | 11 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | sp1rit- | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Tops | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | SchneideR^ | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emefKay | 2482 | 0.18 | 75 min |
| #2 | simONfire_ | 823 | 0.12 | 23 min |
| #3 | Tops | 355 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #4 | sp1rit- | 340 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #5 | SchneideR^ | 251 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emefKay | +1.88 | 72 | 75 |
| #2 | Tibznor | +1.10 | 56 | 75 |
| #3 | sp1rit- | +0.74 | 71 | 66 |
| #4 | SchneideR^ | -0.43 | 68 | 76 |
| #5 | Stryhns | -0.75 | 64 | 64 |





