








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 503 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 115 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3167 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,940 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2673 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3445 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5479 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 2343 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,658,015 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 484 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | h3dd | 352 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #2 | ALEX JONES | 326 | 0.04 | 10 min |
| #3 | Gill | 268 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | ffs | 222 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #5 | Stinky Dingus | 100 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BLOODY BASTARD | +6.21 | 73 | 53 |
| #2 | ALEX JONES | +4.43 | 59 | 57 |
| #3 | Gill | +2.26 | 72 | 57 |
| #4 | h3dd | +2.09 | 69 | 67 |
| #5 | Stinky Dingus | +1.06 | 52 | 59 |





