








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 386 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 174 matches | ||
| Faceit | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3537 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,776 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4846 | 33% |
| Smokes | 4683 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2022 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 3225 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,084,088 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 586 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sock | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | ACK | 59% | 32 |
| #3 | 43 years old | 57% | 37 |
| #4 | OurAnarchy | 54% | 37 |
| #5 | LEVI | 53% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | notorious | 43% | 37 |
| #13 | KnowKapp | 41% | 29 |
| #14 | JachPot | 38% | 29 |
| #15 | CAPTAIN iiNSANO | 36% | 28 |
| #16 | ben | 32% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sammy_boy.GG | 4 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | sock | 4 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | bronzey | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | LEVI | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | OurAnarchy | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bronzey | 385 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #2 | 43 years old | 181 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #3 | KnowKapp | 174 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #4 | JachPot | 138 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | LEVI | 137 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sock | +1.58 | 86 | 53 |
| #2 | ACK | +1.55 | 73 | 45 |
| #3 | OurAnarchy | +0.81 | 63 | 44 |
| #4 | LEVI | +0.73 | 79 | 70 |
| #5 | sammy_boy.GG | +0.53 | 82 | 56 |





