








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
59 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 184 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 52 | 28% |
| Smokes | 19 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 56 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 57 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $28,161 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bell | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | AtomicPenguin | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | TheWeekday | 57% | 7 |
| #4 | llllex123 | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | hoison | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | llllex123 | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | hoison | 44% | 9 |
| #6 | davis | 42% | 12 |
| #7 | Hungry Man the Hungry Rapper | 33% | 3 |
| #8 | Smokii | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | davis | 3 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | hoison | 3 | 0.0201 |
| #3 | TheWeekday | 3 | 0.0246 |
| #4 | llllex123 | 1 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | llllex123 | 20 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #2 | davis | 19 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #3 | hoison | 14 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | TheWeekday | 9 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | Bell | 5 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hoison | +3.81 | 92 | 73 |
| #2 | llllex123 | +3.18 | 52 | 62 |
| #3 | davis | +1.25 | 86 | 41 |
| #4 | Bell | +0.37 | 79 | 35 |
| #5 | TheWeekday | +0.17 | 60 | 60 |





