








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 155 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 106 matches | ||
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1844 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,516 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1651 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1845 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1630 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1390 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $778,692 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | beReje faraon | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | JJAndrei | 65% | 20 |
| #3 | DKDL | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | ✪ hamsik ;o | 54% | 81 |
| #5 | Seppuku 切腹 CG11 | 53% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kannox | 5 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | ✪ hamsik ;o | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Seppuku 切腹 CG11 | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | DKDL | 2 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | Ioana!? | 2 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ hamsik ;o | 295 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #2 | Kannox | 249 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #3 | InexistClau | 230 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #4 | Seppuku 切腹 CG11 | 118 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | Ioana!? | 96 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DKDL | +3.29 | 81 | 59 |
| #2 | JJAndrei | +1.82 | 79 | 59 |
| #3 | Kannox | +1.51 | 61 | 61 |
| #4 | beReje faraon | +1.14 | 82 | 44 |
| #5 | crazy | +0.94 | 57 | 49 |





