








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 309 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 342 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5661 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,655 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3927 | 20% |
| Smokes | 4761 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 6047 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 4920 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,789,888 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 567 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nitezod | 53% | 45 |
| #2 | Gullkalven | 51% | 49 |
| #3 | Boombi | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | pff | 50% | 48 |
| #5 | SpurveN | 48% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | pff | 50% | 48 |
| #5 | SpurveN | 48% | 122 |
| #6 | -- | 47% | 97 |
| #7 | QuezteR | 46% | 71 |
| #8 | CK | 39% | 159 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SpurveN | 17 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Boombi | 11 | 0.0162 |
| #3 | CK | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Gullkalven | 6 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | -- | 4 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SpurveN | 296 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | -- | 209 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | QuezteR | 142 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | pff | 66 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Gullkalven | 55 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boombi | +2.53 | 69 | 38 |
| #2 | -- | +2.25 | 80 | 60 |
| #3 | SpurveN | +2.01 | 67 | 57 |
| #4 | DobbelDose | +1.04 | 74 | 63 |
| #5 | Nitezod | +0.68 | 76 | 60 |





