








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 845 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 198 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 37 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6857 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,972 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6607 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5703 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3261 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 4401 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,547,347 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 347 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | choppyyyyJESUS | 57% | 53 |
| #2 | Own3D | 56% | 114 |
| #3 | rQquin | 49% | 47 |
| #4 | canadaterror#goose | 45% | 33 |
| #5 | HappiNeko | 45% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Deherve | 13 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | sKipz | 10 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | ✠♆ Blix_2k ♆✠ | 10 | 0.0062 |
| #4 | StyxD | 9 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | LpkTank | 9 | 0.0095 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Deherve | 1119 | 0.17 | 29 min |
| #2 | StyxD | 480 | 0.35 | 8 min |
| #3 | Own3D | 445 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #4 | Horigrim | 444 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #5 | sKipz | 383 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HappiNeko | +4.62 | 81 | 64 |
| #2 | choppyyyyJESUS | +3.07 | 63 | 47 |
| #3 | Strabisme | +2.83 | 74 | 68 |
| #4 | LePapouth | +2.63 | 83 | 69 |
| #5 | rQquin | +2.15 | 85 | 37 |





