








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 974 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 485 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 264 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 259 matches | ||
| Premier | 214 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 145 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 109 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




107 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7543 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 75,356 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 15307 | 20% |
| Smokes | 23996 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 17842 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 18211 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,724,398 of utility $45 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | berbemelmath | 58% | 106 |
| #2 | choppyyyyJESUS | 55% | 184 |
| #3 | Artes ✘ | 51% | 103 |
| #4 | sKipz | 50% | 332 |
| #5 | AngeL ❤ | 50% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StyxD | 137 | 0.0124 |
| #2 | Horigrim | 71 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Artes ✘ | 32 | 0.0164 |
| #4 | Strabisme | 31 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | LePapouth | 30 | 0.0083 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LePapouth | +5.05 | 84 | 65 |
| #2 | choppyyyyJESUS | +4.04 | 67 | 48 |
| #3 | Strabisme | +3.92 | 75 | 67 |
| #4 | rQquin | +3.75 | 83 | 36 |
| #5 | AngeL ❤ | +3.13 | 64 | 58 |





