








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 302 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 144 matches | ||
| Faceit | 64 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2382 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,357 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2387 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2857 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2765 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2348 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,033,470 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mols Voldtagerdigovich | 82% | 17 |
| #2 | SoronSR | 59% | 102 |
| #3 | Genaupot | 56% | 120 |
| #4 | fROSTY THE SNOWMAN | 54% | 133 |
| #5 | UNE :-] | 54% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | UNE :-] | 54% | 111 |
| #6 | s!m ☂☂ | 53% | 66 |
| #7 | Ronk | 51% | 107 |
| #8 | Rusthøvlen | 51% | 193 |
| #9 | Kongen af Kolding | 42% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ronk | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Rusthøvlen | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | fROSTY THE SNOWMAN | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | UNE :-] | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Genaupot | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rusthøvlen | 387 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #2 | Ronk | 340 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #3 | UNE :-] | 303 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #4 | SoronSR | 301 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #5 | Genaupot | 221 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mols Voldtagerdigovich | +3.94 | 84 | 73 |
| #2 | Genaupot | +2.28 | 82 | 64 |
| #3 | UNE :-] | +2.04 | 77 | 66 |
| #4 | fROSTY THE SNOWMAN | +0.35 | 69 | 64 |
| #5 | Froto | +0.11 | 59 | 68 |





