








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1248 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 182 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




64 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5441 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,160 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3285 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3304 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2344 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3227 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $851,939 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 578 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JAEPE | 85% | 39 |
| #2 | gongzin | 83% | 24 |
| #3 | hiDen | 80% | 35 |
| #4 | kaZzu 神 | 75% | 85 |
| #5 | xrL. | 75% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | kaZzu 神 | 75% | 85 |
| #5 | xrL. | 75% | 20 |
| #6 | Jubileu | 69% | 196 |
| #7 | OG | 69% | 218 |
| #8 | Mars Simula | 59% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OG | 24 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | Jubileu | 17 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | hiDen | 8 | 0.0107 |
| #4 | kaZzu 神 | 7 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | gongzin | 5 | 0.0115 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jubileu | 674 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | OG | 672 | 0.15 | 17 min |
| #3 | kaZzu 神 | 308 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #4 | JAEPE | 143 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | hiDen | 110 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | raW-- | +4.40 | 86 | 56 |
| #2 | JAEPE | +3.98 | 87 | 76 |
| #3 | OG | +3.34 | 86 | 55 |
| #4 | kaZzu 神 | +1.54 | 82 | 55 |
| #5 | hiDen | -0.31 | 73 | 55 |





