








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 55 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 404 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4238 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,857 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6476 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6715 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5531 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3135 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $745,498 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 86 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stephen. | 56% | 27 |
| #2 | r0beh | 55% | 182 |
| #3 | Step. | 54% | 216 |
| #4 | TomDonkey | 53% | 273 |
| #5 | KrStopher | 52% | 279 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Cakey* -̷̨●̨* #RagePlay | 51% | 140 |
| #7 | Swiggy | 45% | 33 |
| #8 | Tarzaan | 44% | 45 |
| #9 | Sklips | 43% | 28 |
| #10 | H4nnibal | 41% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Step. | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | KrStopher | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | TomDonkey | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Cakey* -̷̨●̨* #RagePlay | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | r0beh | 4 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TomDonkey | 662 | 0.11 | 16 min |
| #2 | KrStopher | 660 | 0.11 | 19 min |
| #3 | Step. | 526 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #4 | Cakey* -̷̨●̨* #RagePlay | 423 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #5 | r0beh | 128 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swiggy | +3.30 | 70 | 32 |
| #2 | Stephen. | +2.52 | 77 | 64 |
| #3 | Sklips | +2.21 | 75 | 68 |
| #4 | Step. | +1.77 | 75 | 72 |
| #5 | r0beh | +0.23 | 75 | 62 |





