








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 678 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 496 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 116 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4992 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,506 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3473 | 12% |
| Smokes | 10683 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 8613 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 6737 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $863,028 of utility $59 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 898 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | default | 55% | 182 |
| #2 | TomDonkey | 53% | 203 |
| #3 | Step. | 53% | 211 |
| #4 | Cakey* -̷̨●̨* #RagePlay | 52% | 192 |
| #5 | KrStopher | 50% | 318 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KrStopher | 776 | 0.12 | 22 min |
| #2 | Cakey* -̷̨●̨* #RagePlay | 583 | 0.15 | 18 min |
| #3 | Step. | 514 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #4 | TomDonkey | 480 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #5 | default | 377 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Step. | +1.48 | 75 | 70 |
| #2 | r0beh | +0.45 | 71 | 66 |
| #3 | KrStopher | +0.19 | 76 | 79 |
| #4 | default | -0.23 | 71 | 74 |
| #5 | TomDonkey | -0.40 | 49 | 75 |





