








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 187 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Wingman | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3860 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,105 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2290 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3560 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2908 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3347 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,015,473 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Don Swang | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | Vaez | 53% | 47 |
| #3 | tjub | 52% | 23 |
| #4 | shown =D | 52% | 27 |
| #5 | Tvebak | 51% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Tvebak | 51% | 88 |
| #6 | Clau1 | 49% | 39 |
| #7 | Venøbo | 49% | 76 |
| #8 | Loerup | 48% | 52 |
| #9 | Sykh | 48% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shown =D | 5 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | Sykh | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Venøbo | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Vaez | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Tvebak | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Loerup | 325 | 0.28 | 10 min |
| #2 | Tvebak | 259 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #3 | Sykh | 139 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | Vaez | 102 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | Don Swang | 64 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shown =D | +3.37 | 84 | 54 |
| #2 | Loerup | +2.42 | 63 | 75 |
| #3 | Vaez | +1.49 | 47 | 58 |
| #4 | vic | +0.97 | 59 | 61 |
| #5 | Tvebak | +0.44 | 64 | 74 |





