








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 335 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1643 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,171 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1296 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1080 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2070 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1725 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $477,938 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 698 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rkL | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | sysT // ewba | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | Hekki | 44% | 9 |
| #4 | Flopster | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | Bast! | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rkL | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | sysT // ewba | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | Hekki | 44% | 9 |
| #4 | Flopster | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | Bast! | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sysT // ewba | 2 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | rkL | 2 | 0.0079 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rkL | 55 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #2 | Bast! | 45 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #3 | Flopster | 31 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | sysT // ewba | 28 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Hekki | 13 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flopster | +2.25 | 89 | 50 |
| #2 | evılmojo | +1.51 | 70 | 67 |
| #3 | Bast! | +1.47 | 69 | 62 |
| #4 | Hekki | +1.03 | 70 | 69 |
| #5 | sysT // ewba | +0.82 | 64 | 73 |





