








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 132 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3474 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3857 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4303 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4638 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4076 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,267,110 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fetzi the funny Landmine | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | julez | 54% | 160 |
| #3 | h1ro | 51% | 312 |
| #4 | Norbert | 50% | 361 |
| #5 | _daisy_merollin | 49% | 311 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | julez | 54% | 160 |
| #3 | h1ro | 51% | 312 |
| #4 | Norbert | 50% | 361 |
| #5 | _daisy_merollin | 49% | 311 |
| #6 | kevin2K | 47% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Norbert | 19 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | h1ro | 17 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | _daisy_merollin | 12 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | julez | 10 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | kevin2K | 5 | 0.0072 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Norbert | 873 | 0.12 | 25 min |
| #2 | h1ro | 449 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #3 | _daisy_merollin | 251 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #4 | julez | 98 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | kevin2K | 39 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | h1ro | +2.17 | 64 | 69 |
| #2 | Fetzi the funny Landmine | +0.89 | 64 | 23 |
| #3 | DMN- | +0.37 | 57 | 63 |
| #4 | julez | -0.10 | 55 | 47 |
| #5 | kevin2K | -0.57 | 60 | 44 |





