








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 323 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 134 matches | ||
| Premier | 31 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1704 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,065 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2244 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2087 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2716 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2018 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $142,951 of utility $40 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 386 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sep1 | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | ⸸VELKA.⸸ | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | kikoG | 58% | 53 |
| #4 | Jusshi | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | Carrey | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sep1 | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | ⸸VELKA.⸸ | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | kikoG | 58% | 53 |
| #4 | Jusshi | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | Carrey | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kikoG | 4 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | sep1 | 2 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Jusshi | 2 | 0.0104 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kikoG | 219 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #2 | ⸸VELKA.⸸ | 47 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | sep1 | 44 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | Carrey | 16 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | Jusshi | 13 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sep1 | +3.58 | 74 | 68 |
| #2 | kikoG | +2.63 | 76 | 66 |
| #3 | Etzq | +1.13 | 63 | 74 |
| #4 | Jusshi | -0.51 | 66 | 67 |
| #5 | Carrey | -2.26 | 63 | 69 |





