








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 418 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 102 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1243 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,040 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1939 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1580 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1136 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1385 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $405,730 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 83 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪MØLLE | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | DroW | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | Smokeyy | 62% | 13 |
| #4 | MrWhiner | 61% | 67 |
| #5 | Phenomenon<333 | 59% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smokeyy | 3 | 0.0109 |
| #2 | typeX | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | JedMos1ey | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrWhiner | +3.79 | 90 | 75 |
| #2 | typeX | +3.21 | 86 | 61 |
| #3 | Miracle^ | +1.20 | 70 | 60 |
| #4 | Smokeyy | +0.72 | 81 | 59 |
| #5 | SLumdawG ★ | -0.31 | 45 | 68 |





