








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 705 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5079 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,557 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2044 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2271 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3836 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 3406 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,416,931 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 179 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CLVN | 56% | 45 |
| #2 | Randi | 52% | 27 |
| #3 | OMAR M'A TUER ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 48% | 29 |
| #4 | 神 Shen ☯ | 48% | 21 |
| #5 | BA.Kazma - Styve | 48% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Randi | 52% | 27 |
| #3 | OMAR M'A TUER ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 48% | 29 |
| #4 | 神 Shen ☯ | 48% | 21 |
| #5 | BA.Kazma - Styve | 48% | 21 |
| #6 | kAwet | 47% | 238 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kAwet | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | CLVN | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | OMAR M'A TUER ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kAwet | 127 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #2 | Randi | 56 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | OMAR M'A TUER ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 52 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | 神 Shen ☯ | 51 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | CLVN | 45 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ReAatw | +3.53 | 87 | 66 |
| #2 | 神 Shen ☯ | +1.45 | 67 | 72 |
| #3 | Randi | -1.07 | 78 | 68 |
| #4 | CLVN | -1.13 | 43 | 51 |
| #5 | kAwet | -1.90 | 82 | 48 |





