








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1093 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 201 matches | ||
| Premier | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 61 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3392 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,777 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2841 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3108 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1721 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2107 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,632,381 of utility $249 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 466 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Swish | 42% | 19 |
| #10 | Showtime | 40% | 53 |
| #11 | RaGe^ | 38% | 24 |
| #12 | Shmoogli Bear | 35% | 96 |
| #13 | whiffE | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Showtime | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | streeter46 | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | ☆ Playboi Kundi ☆ | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | rec0n | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | catdaddycon\TTv | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | streeter46 | 367 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #2 | rec0n | 261 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #3 | ☆ Playboi Kundi ☆ | 219 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | Smurfyyy..^^ | 210 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #5 | Showtime | 203 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RaGe^ | +2.17 | 75 | 61 |
| #2 | rec0n | +2.03 | 89 | 62 |
| #3 | whiffE | +1.67 | 78 | 62 |
| #4 | naBs | +0.67 | 72 | 69 |
| #5 | streeter46 | +0.39 | 81 | 70 |





