








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 712 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 565 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 84 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5079 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,872 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10522 | 38% |
| Smokes | 8984 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4897 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3469 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,342,709 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 212 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | arN STORMAMMA | 51% | 39 |
| #2 | sås | 49% | 154 |
| #3 | LeBob | 48% | 284 |
| #4 | T0st. Tumba-Tarzan | 47% | 134 |
| #5 | arN cså veto ridå | 40% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | sås | 49% | 154 |
| #3 | LeBob | 48% | 284 |
| #4 | T0st. Tumba-Tarzan | 47% | 134 |
| #5 | arN cså veto ridå | 40% | 45 |
| #6 | mattlas | 38% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LeBob | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | T0st. Tumba-Tarzan | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | mattlas | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LeBob | 520 | 0.09 | 16 min |
| #2 | T0st. Tumba-Tarzan | 366 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #3 | sås | 221 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | arN STORMAMMA | 201 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #5 | mattlas | 104 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sås | +2.09 | 81 | 56 |
| #2 | arN STORMAMMA | +2.08 | 73 | 81 |
| #3 | mattlas | +0.39 | 67 | 61 |
| #4 | DA-vai | +0.25 | 61 | 72 |
| #5 | T0st. Tumba-Tarzan | -0.55 | 69 | 60 |





