








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 321 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 263 matches | ||
| Premier | 37 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2522 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,385 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5224 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4583 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2928 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3650 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $802,535 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 177 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEKKOSENKOSTO | 53% | 75 |
| #2 | Adore | 53% | 207 |
| #3 | nexCor | 53% | 19 |
| #4 | jormaruis | 52% | 84 |
| #5 | yrjoo | 51% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Adore | 53% | 207 |
| #3 | nexCor | 53% | 19 |
| #4 | jormaruis | 52% | 84 |
| #5 | yrjoo | 51% | 103 |
| #6 | Lurkins | 43% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jormaruis | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Adore | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | Lurkins | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEKKOSENKOSTO | 439 | 0.27 | 11 min |
| #2 | Adore | 428 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #3 | yrjoo | 182 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | jormaruis | 178 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #5 | Lurkins | 134 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adore | +2.14 | 67 | 66 |
| #2 | jormaruis | +1.41 | 48 | 59 |
| #3 | junes | +0.16 | 61 | 73 |
| #4 | KEKKOSENKOSTO | -0.05 | 46 | 74 |
| #5 | nexCor | -0.77 | 44 | 75 |





