










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 10 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
203 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 673 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 165 | 25% |
| Smokes | 188 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 153 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 167 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $48,553 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Qlocuu | 50% | 4 |
| #6 | Flayy | 50% | 10 |
| #7 | kisserek | 43% | 7 |
| #8 | mhL | 33% | 3 |
| #9 | Sobol | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mhL | 2 | 0.0253 |
| #2 | SZPERO | 1 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | kisserek | 1 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | rallen | 1 | 0.0109 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SZPERO | 42 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #2 | Flayy | 24 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | kisserek | 19 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #4 | Sobol | 14 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | mhL | 12 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rallen | +6.58 | 81 | 88 |
| #2 | Flayy | +5.40 | 95 | 66 |
| #3 | kisserek | +2.77 | 92 | 69 |
| #4 | Qlocuu | +2.77 | 77 | 69 |
| #5 | innocent | +0.06 | 84 | 68 |





