








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 274 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
773 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,570 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 948 | 27% |
| Smokes | 913 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 950 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 759 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $453,906 of utility $237 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 34 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hauskamieS | 59% | 27 |
| #2 | Nazaxed | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | Raitse | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | genec | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | ksh | 50% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Omena | 48% | 31 |
| #7 | kynikki | 48% | 29 |
| #8 | G_G | 44% | 34 |
| #9 | banger | 40% | 10 |
| #10 | SMUGUDILAATIO | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | G_G | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | ksh | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | genec | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Omena | 128 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #2 | ksh | 93 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | G_G | 65 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Raitse | 64 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | SMUGUDILAATIO | 57 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hauskamieS | +3.95 | 90 | 51 |
| #2 | Raitse | +0.66 | 77 | 74 |
| #3 | banger | +0.52 | 76 | 79 |
| #4 | kynikki | +0.14 | 70 | 58 |
| #5 | G_G | +0.08 | 73 | 64 |





