








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1630 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 362 matches | ||
| Faceit | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4392 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,662 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10349 | 42% |
| Smokes | 5390 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3373 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 5550 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,276,655 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 498 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SANTANA | 53% | 32 |
| #2 | Sandy Ravage | 50% | 189 |
| #3 | STILLER | 49% | 147 |
| #4 | Glory. | 43% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SANTANA | 53% | 32 |
| #2 | Sandy Ravage | 50% | 189 |
| #3 | STILLER | 49% | 147 |
| #4 | Glory. | 43% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | STILLER | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Sandy Ravage | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Glory. | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | SANTANA | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sandy Ravage | 440 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #2 | Glory. | 188 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #3 | SANTANA | 115 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | STILLER | 80 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LEW | +0.81 | 69 | 70 |
| #2 | STILLER | +0.52 | 71 | 41 |
| #3 | Sandy Ravage | -0.40 | 77 | 70 |
| #4 | SANTANA | -1.00 | 44 | 59 |
| #5 | Glory. | -2.08 | 44 | 50 |





