








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 226 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3813 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,600 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5221 | 38% |
| Smokes | 2678 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2724 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2977 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,659,242 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 699 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ≧ᴸˢ≦ Hcräveler | 52% | 117 |
| #7 | biisoni | 51% | 185 |
| #8 | spessudessu | 50% | 159 |
| #9 | trampalgin clubmac | 46% | 76 |
| #10 | qMS | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | timotronic | 12 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | biisoni | 9 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | spessudessu | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | ≧ᴸˢ≦ Hcräveler | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | MakeaPrinssi | 2 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | timotronic | 785 | 0.21 | 25 min |
| #2 | spessudessu | 626 | 0.19 | 16 min |
| #3 | biisoni | 528 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #4 | ≧ᴸˢ≦ Hcräveler | 242 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #5 | Jorma Heart | 142 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | timotronic | +3.70 | 79 | 67 |
| #2 | Armas | +2.21 | 68 | 75 |
| #3 | ≧ᴸˢ≦ Hcräveler | +1.97 | 85 | 72 |
| #4 | MakeaPrinssi | +1.41 | 69 | 39 |
| #5 | Jorma Heart | +1.17 | 42 | 66 |





