








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 291 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 240 matches | ||
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4277 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,811 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3303 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2595 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3677 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2236 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $674,303 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 576 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lulle <3 | 63% | 112 |
| #2 | Scuupy | 63% | 65 |
| #3 | -sandersson | 58% | 79 |
| #4 | HSP LilForce♕ | 54% | 24 |
| #5 | MARÄNGMANGLARMANGE | 40% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lulle <3 | 63% | 112 |
| #2 | Scuupy | 63% | 65 |
| #3 | -sandersson | 58% | 79 |
| #4 | HSP LilForce♕ | 54% | 24 |
| #5 | MARÄNGMANGLARMANGE | 40% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lulle <3 | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | -sandersson | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Scuupy | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | HSP LilForce♕ | 2 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | MARÄNGMANGLARMANGE | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lulle <3 | 476 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #2 | -sandersson | 183 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | Scuupy | 108 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | HSP LilForce♕ | 78 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | MARÄNGMANGLARMANGE | 66 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aecklig <3 | +2.23 | 86 | 60 |
| #2 | Lulle <3 | +0.26 | 70 | 65 |
| #3 | Scuupy | +0.20 | 68 | 52 |
| #4 | HSP LilForce♕ | -0.63 | 69 | 73 |
| #5 | -sandersson | -0.91 | 69 | 58 |





