








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 200 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 62 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2341 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,034 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1477 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1414 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2255 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1888 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $888,446 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | warpguod | 90% | 20 |
| #2 | bluek1ng | 84% | 37 |
| #3 | Waffe | 82% | 56 |
| #4 | BUI | 81% | 21 |
| #5 | yor1mato | 78% | 202 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yor1mato | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | ramuss | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Waffe | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | °˖✧ Vendetta ✧˖° | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | jy | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yor1mato | 684 | 0.18 | 24 min |
| #2 | ramuss | 441 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #3 | Waffe | 94 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | bluek1ng | 93 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | °˖✧ Vendetta ✧˖° | 91 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Waffe | +4.33 | 90 | 50 |
| #2 | bluek1ng | +3.99 | 94 | 59 |
| #3 | warpguod | +3.93 | 90 | 39 |
| #4 | BUI | +2.87 | 75 | 64 |
| #5 | ramuss | +2.49 | 76 | 68 |





