








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 84 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2049 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,139 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3182 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3228 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2470 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3259 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $460,900 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 362 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Olelelele | 83% | 46 |
| #2 | Bjarkebille | 79% | 42 |
| #3 | S15T3Mgrrrrr | 76% | 55 |
| #4 | zyDn- | 73% | 15 |
| #5 | propit3 | 69% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | S15T3Mgrrrrr | 76% | 55 |
| #4 | zyDn- | 73% | 15 |
| #5 | propit3 | 69% | 29 |
| #6 | [F5] fennx | 66% | 47 |
| #7 | xXProjectXx | 59% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zyDn- | 2 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | S15T3Mgrrrrr | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Olelelele | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | xXProjectXx | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S15T3Mgrrrrr | 86 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #2 | Olelelele | 61 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | propit3 | 55 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | [F5] fennx | 49 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | xXProjectXx | 41 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Olelelele | +1.72 | 61 | 58 |
| #2 | Niholas | +1.08 | 73 | 75 |
| #3 | S15T3Mgrrrrr | +0.85 | 56 | 69 |
| #4 | propit3 | +0.78 | 43 | 47 |
| #5 | [F5] fennx | +0.01 | 75 | 51 |





