








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 362 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 128 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1132 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,913 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1236 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1368 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 871 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1438 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $681,039 of utility $238 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 387 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ninezeraa- | 70% | 53 |
| #2 | vtnn- | 62% | 126 |
| #3 | TACOCS | 61% | 122 |
| #4 | Yuki2k | 59% | 119 |
| #5 | ⚡ TwnN- | 57% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ninezeraa- | 70% | 53 |
| #2 | vtnn- | 62% | 126 |
| #3 | TACOCS | 61% | 122 |
| #4 | Yuki2k | 59% | 119 |
| #5 | ⚡ TwnN- | 57% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TACOCS | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | vtnn- | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | Yuki2k | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vtnn- | 1021 | 0.37 | 30 min |
| #2 | Yuki2k | 557 | 0.21 | 16 min |
| #3 | ⚡ TwnN- | 343 | 0.26 | 11 min |
| #4 | TACOCS | 323 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #5 | ninezeraa- | 188 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ninezeraa- | +3.66 | 87 | 73 |
| #2 | Yuki2k | +1.23 | 73 | 72 |
| #3 | vtnn- | +1.04 | 80 | 85 |
| #4 | vhs | -0.79 | 62 | 63 |
| #5 | TACOCS | -1.31 | 52 | 67 |





