








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 517 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 377 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3834 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,431 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2425 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3323 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3358 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3325 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,047,233 of utility $229 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 363 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KRO | 52% | 83 |
| #2 | Kubomi | 50% | 42 |
| #3 | Dybbis | 49% | 400 |
| #4 | martinsen | 49% | 335 |
| #5 | Stutmunn | 49% | 409 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Kubomi | 50% | 42 |
| #3 | Dybbis | 49% | 400 |
| #4 | martinsen | 49% | 335 |
| #5 | Stutmunn | 49% | 409 |
| #6 | Togmannen | 46% | 351 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Togmannen | 10 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Stutmunn | 7 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Dybbis | 4 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | martinsen | 4 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | KRO | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stutmunn | 1552 | 0.18 | 47 min |
| #2 | Dybbis | 1261 | 0.15 | 39 min |
| #3 | martinsen | 531 | 0.07 | 15 min |
| #4 | Togmannen | 363 | 0.05 | 10 min |
| #5 | KRO | 249 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stutmunn | +0.07 | 52 | 76 |
| #2 | nifty | +0.06 | 61 | 60 |
| #3 | Kubomi | -0.44 | 75 | 50 |
| #4 | Dybbis | -0.63 | 51 | 75 |
| #5 | martinsen | -0.66 | 82 | 58 |





