








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 233 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2311 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,561 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3244 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3159 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2849 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2309 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $395,761 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kyösti | 70% | 27 |
| #2 | katsastusukko | 69% | 35 |
| #3 | Sepe | 65% | 23 |
| #4 | Ghetto-Child | 63% | 41 |
| #5 | banzaooo | 59% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Willtord (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ ) | 43% | 23 |
| #13 | ♥Nemu♥ | 41% | 63 |
| #14 | kylbert | 40% | 25 |
| #15 | RetZki | 40% | 48 |
| #16 | Mauri Kunnas | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hösti | 4 | 0.0073 |
| #2 | Wombat | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | banzaooo | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | RetZki | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | NUGISTERI | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | banzaooo | 436 | 0.31 | 13 min |
| #2 | Wombat | 296 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | ♥Nemu♥ | 137 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | kylbert | 110 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | NUGISTERI | 94 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | banzaooo | +2.64 | 73 | 71 |
| #2 | Kyösti | +2.29 | 73 | 77 |
| #3 | Hösti | +2.10 | 62 | 65 |
| #4 | kylbert | +1.50 | 69 | 63 |
| #5 | Soskate | +0.87 | 62 | 75 |





