








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 57 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1137 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,900 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 761 | 26% |
| Smokes | 756 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 580 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 803 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $272,758 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FANCY | 90% | 10 |
| #2 | bast1 | 76% | 21 |
| #3 | Zazu | 75% | 12 |
| #4 | tornadotob1 | 74% | 35 |
| #5 | SyKo | 73% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | svN' | 67% | 9 |
| #9 | dan1el | 66% | 73 |
| #10 | Nqrman | 65% | 49 |
| #11 | Tuddy | 57% | 7 |
| #12 | Final | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dan1el | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | tornadotob1 | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dan1el | 364 | 0.26 | 9 min |
| #2 | Nqrman | 124 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #3 | tornadotob1 | 106 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | N3ptun | 64 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #5 | Zazu | 48 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FANCY | +2.87 | 80 | 51 |
| #2 | SyKo | +2.82 | 88 | 64 |
| #3 | dan1el | +2.62 | 77 | 76 |
| #4 | Tuddy | +1.99 | 67 | 65 |
| #5 | sho | +1.23 | 86 | 47 |





