








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 59 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 31 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
541 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,452 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 367 | 25% |
| Smokes | 358 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 428 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 299 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $229,510 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bradur | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | muuIiturpa | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | R_QU | 62% | 13 |
| #4 | Samson | 59% | 27 |
| #5 | nägy | 54% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | htgw | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | nägy | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | bradur | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Samson | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | muuIiturpa | 1 | 0.0064 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | htgw | 100 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | nägy | 77 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | bradur | 70 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | Samson | 37 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | muuIiturpa | 31 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | htgw | +3.41 | 61 | 62 |
| #2 | muuIiturpa | +0.45 | 58 | 68 |
| #3 | Samson | +0.25 | 46 | 63 |
| #4 | tubi | +0.11 | 55 | 55 |
| #5 | nägy | -0.32 | 65 | 70 |





