








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 381 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 219 matches | ||
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 63 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2509 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,734 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3034 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4961 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 3255 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2484 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $863,401 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 713 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m1n1ben | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | JJ ice | 53% | 47 |
| #3 | Megatron | 53% | 85 |
| #4 | ♿Winther* | 50% | 235 |
| #5 | Faxelight | 50% | 222 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m1n1ben | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | JJ ice | 53% | 47 |
| #3 | Megatron | 53% | 85 |
| #4 | ♿Winther* | 50% | 235 |
| #5 | Faxelight | 50% | 222 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faxelight | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #2 | ♿Winther* | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faxelight | 643 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #2 | ♿Winther* | 371 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #3 | Megatron | 43 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | JJ ice | 22 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | m1n1ben | 14 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m1n1ben | +4.27 | 68 | 66 |
| #2 | Walter White | +1.70 | 71 | 66 |
| #3 | Megatron | +0.01 | 58 | 43 |
| #4 | ♿Winther* | -0.56 | 47 | 71 |
| #5 | Faxelight | -1.36 | 43 | 59 |





