










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 416 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 405 matches | ||
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2684 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,323 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1930 | 17% |
| Smokes | 3330 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2958 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3105 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,208,336 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 129 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fANCY | 54% | 74 |
| #2 | the_carrieD | 48% | 61 |
| #3 | Jur¡k 20FPS | 47% | 125 |
| #4 | diggebrischd.exe | 47% | 418 |
| #5 | MadNine | 45% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | diggebrischd.exe | 8 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Tony Chopper | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | bobby | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | fANCY | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | ✪ resiaK | 3 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tony Chopper | 516 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #2 | diggebrischd.exe | 456 | 0.05 | 11 min |
| #3 | fANCY | 385 | 0.23 | 12 min |
| #4 | MadNine | 311 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #5 | the_carrieD | 283 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ resiaK | +4.56 | 90 | 67 |
| #2 | fANCY | +2.82 | 60 | 78 |
| #3 | the_carrieD | +2.66 | 78 | 69 |
| #4 | bobby | +2.21 | 75 | 28 |
| #5 | diggebrischd.exe | +1.37 | 45 | 51 |





