








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 59 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 136 matches | ||
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5093 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,195 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 407 | 8% |
| Smokes | 504 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 2375 | 46% |
| Molotovs | 1909 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $831,450 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 607 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nate | 66% | 86 |
| #2 | Malik Anderson | 66% | 180 |
| #3 | LiamTFN | 59% | 61 |
| #4 | (u_u) | 48% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nate | 66% | 86 |
| #2 | Malik Anderson | 66% | 180 |
| #3 | LiamTFN | 59% | 61 |
| #4 | (u_u) | 48% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Malik Anderson | 47 | 0.0131 |
| #2 | nate | 17 | 0.0099 |
| #3 | LiamTFN | 11 | 0.0094 |
| #4 | (u_u) | 10 | 0.0226 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Malik Anderson | 470 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #2 | nate | 369 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #3 | LiamTFN | 109 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | (u_u) | 38 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | derek | +4.31 | 88 | 22 |
| #2 | Malik Anderson | +0.44 | 84 | 46 |
| #3 | nate | -0.22 | 65 | 50 |
| #4 | LiamTFN | -1.13 | 83 | 45 |
| #5 | (u_u) | -5.05 | 39 | 27 |





