








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 239 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 110 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2519 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,461 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2247 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2492 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1815 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1907 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $606,638 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 305 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Azidtrips | 92% | 12 |
| #2 | antyrone | 58% | 55 |
| #3 | such solid wow | 57% | 47 |
| #4 | dr_greggen | 57% | 96 |
| #5 | Kurwatunturi | 54% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dr_greggen | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Kurwatunturi | 5 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Virppo | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | antyrone | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Hendelson3k | 2 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | such solid wow | 174 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #2 | dr_greggen | 161 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | Kurwatunturi | 138 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | Virppo | 98 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Hendelson3k | 91 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dr_greggen | +2.79 | 82 | 61 |
| #2 | Azidtrips | +1.87 | 69 | 72 |
| #3 | bobbyblaster | +1.43 | 72 | 67 |
| #4 | such solid wow | +0.96 | 73 | 63 |
| #5 | skurre | +0.26 | 85 | 56 |





