








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 672 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 332 matches | ||
| Wingman | 248 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 170 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5380 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,863 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2117 | 13% |
| Smokes | 4160 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 7297 | 43% |
| Molotovs | 3289 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,259,761 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | PlukkeTuffeR | 44% | 715 |
| #9 | KrMbe | 44% | 124 |
| #10 | Zarkos [M] | 43% | 77 |
| #11 | Yonie | 41% | 107 |
| #12 | Sheshnir | 40% | 154 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PlukkeTuffeR | 2081 | 0.15 | 54 min |
| #2 | knsL | 357 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #3 | eaz | 306 | 0.04 | 9 min |
| #4 | KrMbe | 268 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #5 | Cosmo | 210 | 0.11 | 5 min |





